The top ten things I'd like for christmas

10. Hair - growing where it should
9. No Hair - growing where it shouldn't
8. Trump to lose the worst comb-over in modern history
7. To knock the shit eatin' grin off of Rumsfeld
6. The Democratic Party to grow some balls before it's too late
5. Healthy, nutrious Beer
4. Never to see another image of Viktor Yushchenko until the green is gone, poor bastard
3. Bill Gates' couch cushion change
2. A professional hockey league

and the number one thing I'd like for Christmas
Peace on Earth, Good will towards men, and a 50 million dollar bankroll

The top ten Gilligan's Island characters from Washington

10. Gilligan - "W"
9. The Skipper - Cheney
8. Mary Ann - Condi Rice
7. Ginger - Zell Miller
6. Thurston Howell III - Tony Blair
5. "Lovey" Howell - Rumsfeld
4. The Professer - Colin Powell
3. Headshrinker - Saddam Hussein
2. Wrongway Feldman - Tom Ridge

and the number one Gilligan's Island Character from Washington,
Pancho Hernando Gonzales Enrico Rodriguez (the exiled south american president) - Fidel Castro